When it comes to lasting longer in bed there are a lot of myths out there and I am here to dissect the top 10 most common myths that men and women believe about premature ejaculation.
Here are the top 10 myths that the men most often believe about Premature Ejaculation
- women want to be pounded away at for hours
- Men believe that there is a prescription that can fit premature ejaculation
- Wipes, creams, and numbing condoms can cure premature ejaculation
- That it gets better with age
- Premature Ejaculation is caused by too many nerve endings on the head of your penis
- That you can make up for it using your hands and mouth
- That going to a doctor will help you
- Don’t need the help of their partner
- That if you can last longer in bed you will automatically be good at sex
- Your stamina is not the only reason that she isn’t reaching orgasm from penetration
Let’s learn more about each topic below
1. women want to be pounded away at for hours
Now am I suggesting that women do not want sex to go on for a long time, No! Not at all. But, an hour to two hours of sex is sufficient, you do not need to be able to be pounding away and penetrating for an hour, hour and a half, an hour plus. If you can have sex from start to finish including foreplay for about 45 minutes to an hour that’s phenomenal, that is really good. Women do not need too much longer than that. In fact, 20 to 30 minutes is about what most women need in order to have an orgasm and feel complete with sex.
2. Men believe that there is a prescription that can fit premature ejaculation
To date, there is no medication that cures premature ejaculation. Anyone that tells you otherwise he is straight-up lying. There are off-label prescription drugs often antidepressant that can be used to treat premature ejaculation but they don’t cure premature ejaculation. Any more than Ibuprofen or acetaminophen cure a headache sure they can stop you from feeling the pain associated with the headache but, do they actually go into your brain and fix the imbalance or the dehydration or the combination of sunlight, exposure to allergens or whatever that is causing the headache? No, they are Band-Aid solutions and antidepressants which I personally don’t want to take if I’m not depressed or not really a long-term solution. They don’t really cure premature ejaculation, they just make it harder for you to ejaculate at all which is not better.
3. Wipes, creams, and numbing condoms can cure premature ejaculation
what numbing creams, condoms, and wipe can do is make you feel nothing and make you go soft. They don’t cure premature ejaculation again any more than a Band-Aid can cure an axe wound. I think I’ve made that one clear.
4. That it gets better with age
It doesn’t. I have plenty of men who reach out to me, they are in their 40’s or their 50’s, they are on their second marriage, they’re dating a new woman after a nasty divorce, and they thought that now they would be able to last longer in bed because they’re full-grown adults only to find out that no they can’t and they don’t. It’s not going to go away on its own with age and you need to do something about it.
5. Premature Ejaculation is caused by too many nerve endings on the head of your penis
The clitoris has many many times the number of nerve endings that men have on their penis and yet the minute that someone touches woman’s clitoris they do not explode into a thousand bits and pieces and that is because it has nothing to do with the number of nerve endings on your penis which is why numbing creams.
6. That you can make up for it using your hands and mouth
Certainly, a lot of the men that come to work with me or fill out my application form will say things to me like it’s fine I’m really really good at oral sex, I’m really really good at using my hands, and my mouth and that’s great I believe you when you say that you are great at oral sex. It’s different, it’s just different. Oral sex is phenomenal, women wouldn’t trade someone that was great at oral sex for someone that wasn’t willfully. But, Women wouldn’t trade oral sex for vaginal sex and vaginal penetration or anal sex with anal penetration. Women want you to be a well-rounded lover and leaning on your strength and ignoring your weaknesses is not the way to get better at the game of sex.
7. That going to a doctor will help you
You should go to the doctor. I think the average man doesn’t go to a doctor nearly enough. You should get a check-up to make sure that things are good. Get your testosterone checked but, No doctor is going to really be able to help you with premature ejaculation unless that doctor is a psychologist and sex therapist can help you the context of your premature ejaculation like depression or performance anxiety. If you’re suffering from any of those please do go see a psychiatrist or psychologist or sex therapist or a mental health professional of your choosing. You can use your medical insurance if you have it or go to Psychology today. If you don’t suffer from a mental health condition you can consult a sex therapist who can help you to last longer in bed.
8. Don’t need the help of their partner
a lot of guys think that they’re going to cure their premature ejaculation without ever addressing it with their partner letting her even know that they’re working on it and I strictly advise against this with my clients. I want your female partner to be invested in you lasting longer in bed. The thing is that most guys nine times out of ten lasting longer because they want sex to be better for their partner. Communicate with her, let her know how she can help you to last longer in bed.
9. That if you can last longer in bed you will automatically be good at sex
This is so dumb and the average guy thinks that if he can last for 30 minutes, he’ll automatically be a great lover and she’s automatically going to be screaming down the house every time you have sex. it’s not true that time alone is going to make you a great lover. Being a lover is more than just minutes on a clock. It’s not that simple, all the stamina in the world is not necessarily going to help you to get better at penetrative sex.
10. Your stamina is not the only reason that she isn’t reaching orgasm from penetration
Bringing a woman to orgasm through penetrative sex is a system and a process. it is not as simple as just banging away from the perfect angle, using the perfect crusting technique for 30 minutes. Any woman that tells you otherwise is lying. it’s more complicated than that you need a system because it’s not as simple as just beating the clock, in fact, it doesn’t even start there. Being a great lover requires being able to read her, tap into her, get in tune with her, connect with her on a level that is beyond whatever the performance anxiety may have had you thinking and feeling. So, if you are interested in helping your partner to achieve orgasm through penetration, certainly lasting longer will help, but you need a complete system.